What is to come...

April 25, 2009

Danielle Joyner Kelley

“The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." Deuteronomy 31:8.

In days of economic recessions and swine flu outbreaks, it is hard to keep a grasp on faith. Everything in you wants to let go and give everything to God in your own life, but when you see others being affected by something you start to worry that you will be affected to. We forget at that moment where our faith lies.

When faced with something sudden and horrific we tend to panic. Our fight or flight response kicks in and we think, “I don’t want to die in a flu pandemic” or “I don’t want to be so poor that I cannot afford to live”. And at that moment we have a new focus that takes our focus off of God. Aside from the panic is the reality. No, you don’t want to die that way, but you could have died two hours ago from a heart attack, or you could die tonight in your sleep. And you are worried about a possible pandemic? Start thinking about this very second. The reality is that it could be your last.

Then the point hits home. We don’t need to worry about something that is affecting others and may or may not affect us and cause our death. We need to realize that our death is coming, whether by a virus or whatever other means, our death is certain. The fear is not that we die, but that we are dying. We all know we are going to die, but what we fear is how we will. That is such a harsh reality to face, and when we think of it we become like children begging and pleading, but the truth is that not only can it happen, it will.

As I grew closer in my relationship with God, facing the subject of death was inevitable. He sent His son to die so we can be with Him one day, so facing death was a given. When I kept growing closer to Him, ironically it wasn’t facing death that scared me. Instead what scared me were the people who were not facing it. I have seen people living in the moment, gratified by everything this Earth can give to them, moaning and wailing about how someone hurt them or they did not get some thing, and I become sick. I know from following God’s word that is not what we are supposed to do. I would think, “What if they die in an hour?”. I cannot imagine facing my judgment without God being one of the very last thoughts in my mind. That scared me.

What scared me more when I thought of those people, is where we go from here. Everyone, no matter what religion or if they are non-religious, has thought about where you go when you die. Are you just in the ground sitting there? Are you just ashes up on a mantle?

And wherever we go is permanent. This life is not. So why are we so concerned with the temporary and not the permanent? When we rent a house while building another which one do we spend so much time going over plans with builders on? Which one do we worry about paint colors, tile, and countertops over? The one that is being built. The permanent one. And the afterlife is permanent. The phrase “eternal life” is used in the Bible for a reason. “Man is like a breath; his days are like a fleeting shadow.” Psalm 144:4.

God never promises us that we will not die in bodily form. His promises relate more to your afterlife based on how you carry yourself here on Earth. You are to start living now as you would there. "I tell you the truth, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” Matthew 18:18.

But God doesn’t set you up for failure. He does not want you attached to the world because He knows that you will be leaving it. And it becomes hard as followers sometimes to know that our hard work may not benefit us here, but elsewhere. The Bible tells us that some of the most devoted followers of God, and some of the biggest heroes in the Bible,“…were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.” Hebrews 11:39-40. Although their descendants received the promise here on Earth, they did not. But what God knows that we don't is what we will get after we leave here. But first we have to die.

When I used to think of this subject, panic would well up inside of me. My grandfather was a Baptist preacher. He was my mother’s father and he had three daughters (my mother and my two aunts). When I used to go to his house I would look at his bookcase and I saw a lot of books about death. I remember thinking, even back then, “Is he scared to die? He is a minister.” I’m not sure what the answer to that question is, but I know I was scared to die. When he died, my mother went through a lot. She found herself in the position of fighting for what he told all of us he wanted through a legal dispute over a will. My grandmother had died many years earlier and he had remarried. My mother was so hurt and so angry, and I remember her crying all the time.

One night during that time I had a dream. In my dream I was a little girl (although I was 16 at the time) and I walked into his bedroom and he was lying on his bed. He sat up, dressed in an all-white robe, and looked at me and smiled. He said, “Tell your mother not to cry for me anymore. It is so beautiful here, you could not even imagine.” I felt so much peace. The next morning I went running to my mother to tell her and noticed she was on the phone. I told her anyway because I could not hold it in and she said to my aunt (her sister) who was on the phone “Jamie, did you hear that?”. I was puzzled and looked at her wondering what she was saying, but then she looked at me and said, “Jamie had the same dream last night.” I remember feeling shocked and having chills. We were not people who were looking for miracles or confirmation, but it came upon us just the same. That was my only contact with anything to do with an afterlife, but I was convinced. We are going someplace besides here. I remember after that day wishing I had asked my grandfather more questions. He was the type of man that didn’t talk about stuff we would think of as strange.

If I had said the words “near death experience” I can’t imagine what he would have said. One day my aunt told me that when she was little he was called to minister to a man who had a heart attack and insisted on seeing a Pastor. The man did not belong to a church, but insisted he talked with someone from one. He had a heart attack and the doctors had ruled him dead when he shocked them by coming back to life. My grandfather got the call (this was a small town then) to come and see him. When my grandfather met with him, the man told him that he had died and gone to hell, and wanted to be saved. I don’t know much more about the story, and my grandfather would not have been the kind to tell, but judging from the man’s desire to find a Pastor when he was not a member of a church, after what he went through I can only imagine what he thought about Hell. It takes faith to believe in those stories. It took faith for me to believe my dream was real. It took faith to believe my aunt had the same dream the same night. Still there are others who have dealt with death that have even more faith.

I have represented people who have had family members killed. I have watched those same people, who were terrified of death before, become ready to die at any moment. They miss their loved one. And their faith tells them that they will see them again. In turn, their faith becomes even stronger because they know they will see their loved one when they get to Heaven, and death is not a fear. It isn’t hard to believe that we are not as scared of death when we know we will have company there to greet us. And those people, even though they feel so weak and hurt, are some of the strongest people I know. “For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Corinthians 12:10.

And God has shown us from the beginning. The One who saved me and reconciled me with God? Jesus? He died, but He was raised from the dead. And I will die, but I too will rise.

Anyone who knows me knows how scared I was of this subject. I still am; after all I am human. But part of me thinks of the loved ones who have gone before me and thinks, “Wow, they have seen Jesus.” And my heart melts. I remember getting excited when a family member told me they got a celebrity autograph, so think about what I feel about the loved ones seeing our Savior.

And then I am not so afraid. I know He loves me, and I know He protects me. And I truly feel that when my time comes He will be with me in every way possible, and even though everyone around me is fearful, I will not be because I will be able to see my faith becoming my new reality.

And then I know His truth: I was put here so I could go there. There is my goal. There will be my reality for eternity. So the economy can have its recession, and swine can have their flu. I have my God.

“Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” James 4:14.