Set it Free...(Dealing with Others Series Part IV)

September 25, 2009

Danielle Joyner Kelley

“I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.” Psalm 118:32.

The saying “if you love something set it free…” is a favorite in society. Truthfully, this saying has more application to our own lives than we often realize. Something we love we often have to set free. God is no different. “You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness.” Romans 6:18.

Sometimes God knows that setting us free from certain relationships will keep us focused on Him. It is no secret that others cause us to fall. “When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.” Genesis 3:6. When God sees your fall as a possibility, expect Him to do whatever He can to protect you.

As Christians we have obligations to help and forgive others. What is missed is that in carrying out our obligations to others, we are to work to stay right with God. Many of our own misperceptions have hampered our ability to do both, and the belief is that when we walk away we are judging and are unforgiving, but this is not necessarily so.

The misperceptions and difficulties come from our “either / or” mentality. For some reason we are under the impression that we cannot remove ourselves from a relationship without judging the other person or refusing to forgive them. In this situation, God is not asking you to decide “either / or”, but He is asking you to choose “and”.

A common misperception is that we can only walk away from relationships that consist of a Christian and a non-believer. “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?” 2 Corinthians 6:14. The truth is that God will protect you from any relationship that is causes you to fall. “In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, we command you, brothers, to keep away from every brother who is idle and does not live according to the teaching you received from us.” 2 Thessalonians 3:6.

“Brother” can mean anyone, including those of us together in the Body of Christ. “But now I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler. With such a man do not even eat.” 1 Corinthians 5:11.

True freedom comes from knowing the truth, and the truth is that you can walk away and forgive. “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." John 8:32. When we convince ourselves that it is “either / or” we have taken the focus off of God. If you pray for a person that you have walked away from based on God’s instruction, you have shown God that you forgive them. When you trust Him to help that person, you are showing that you are not judging them, but you are hoping He will help them. Always remember when you are forgiving others; you are doing it for God. He is the one that needs to know before anyone else. “He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” Colossians 1:17.

On the other side, people often convince themselves that they can leave just anyone that they do not feel is up to their standards. "Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me; and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.” Matthew 10:37-39.

However, God is not asking us to suffer, but He is asking us to trust first in the only one that will not cause us to feel the mistrust and pain that we cause each other, and that is Him. When both people put Him first in a relationship, not merely in words, but in their lifestyle and actions, there is guarantee of success. “In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.” James 2:17.

In reality, you should never walk away from any relationship without His instruction to do so. Your heart will tell you when it is right if you are relying on the Holy Spirit’s guidance. Only then will you know it is the truth, and moreover,

That you have been set free.